It was day two of a life coaching seminar in New York City I had signed up for after falling into a dangerously deep depression. I had had a major breakthrough during the morning session. A New York City bohemian chic woman had confessed to the group about an attempted rape on her at a young age and how keeping that secret from her family had affected her entire life.

In that moment, the voice and words that had repeated in my head a week earlier when I contemplated suicide popped up again. “You are not good enough.’’ And again I asked, who is that? All at once, I had an answer.

It was me—the five-year-old version of me. She was lonely and scared after a violent breakup between her parents. She lost the attention of the man she loved most in the world and now had to do whatever it took to maintain the love and attention of her mom.

In the past year, I had made a significant number of changes in my life. I had divorced my husband of two years, who is a good person, but not the one for me. A relationship I knew wasn’t going to work in the beginning, but I ignored the red flags because I wanted to “help” him. We succeeded in developing a wonderful friendship, but it wasn’t enough for me. I needed passion, passion in a relationship with someone who had their own passions.

One Saturday after an emotional back and forth with my then husband, I set off to New York for a three hour yoga class with a yoga guru named Dharma Mittra. My favorite yoga teacher had raved about him and I was searching for a school for yoga teacher training so I pushed myself to go.

The moment I walked into the warm and sacred studio space on 23^rd and 3^rd street, I knew I was home. I felt like I was being held in my mother’s warm arms as a child. I wanted to laugh and I wanted to cry. This is where I would become a yoga teacher. I had finally found my true way to help people and now I had found my teacher.

Practicing with Dharma was challenging physically, mentally and spiritually. What I loved most about him was that although he spoke of God, our purpose in life and living a vegetarian life, he also made fun of himself and appeared humble. I signed up for his training shortly after.

Dharma’s yoga teacher training was more than I could have ever imagined. I connected with a few of the other students in a way I had never connected with anyone before, men and women. I felt like we were a family, we understood each other and loved each other unconditionally.

The training was physically exhausting, mentally challenging and spirit awakening.  The physical part was the practice to exhaust the body so that the mind could be more available to quiet itself for meditation and self-contemplation. I experienced so many beautiful moments of bliss on my own and with my new friends.

At the end of the training Dharma said, the true practice of yoga is out there and New York is the best place to practice it. The yoga he taught us was the settling of the mind and brightening of the spirit. And he was right—the hardest part was going out into the real world and maintaining it in yourself so you can effectively share this gift of peace and joy with others.

The next day I went back to work as a full-time senior marketing specialist at Hess Corporation, a major U.S. oil company. I had hated this job for almost four years now and had suffered weekly breakdowns with my disconnect between wanting to be an honest and good person all the time and meeting Hess’ demand for playing the corporate game.

I decided that I would share my newfound peace and joy with others and that would make this job great.

That didn’t work; the happier I was, the more others seemed to be annoyed by me and want to bring me down. As I walked into the building in the morning, I could feel how the energy changed in me and the people around me. Everyone’s shoulders would hunch on the elevator; they would take the deepest sighs, and their heads would drop as they reluctantly walked out onto their floors.

I hoped that bringing yoga would help those who wanted it, but was met with opposition by the CEO who stated that yoga was unsanitary and therefore could not be offered in the building.

To try and maintain my happy feeling for as long as I could, I started looking for yoga work. I thought this would be hard, but my effort matched my results. Within a month, I had 11 classes, a mix of group and private classes in addition to my full-time job.

I loved teaching and meeting new people so much and my energy lasted for a few months, but eventually, my director started noticing my prioritization of yoga. She took away my flex hours, which I had for a year and piled on more work.

Under this pressure, I did what I thought was the practical thing to do; I did what the voice in my head influenced by my mom said: “The economy is very bad, Brenda. You can’t give up your job at Hess, Brenda. You are lucky. Yoga is nice, but it won’t pay the bills.”

So I started giving up my yoga classes and focusing more on my marketing work. This resulted in a promotion at Hess and the beginning of my deepest depression yet.

One Saturday night, I sat on the couch of my apartment and felt so lonely and scared that I cried out loud. “I am not good enough! I am not good enough!” I asked myself why and had no answer. I cried myself to sleep that night hoping the pain would go away, but it only arose ten times stronger.

I called and texted my closest friends and family hoping they could give me the wise words to snap out of it, but no one could. Luckily, the warmth of my mother’s nervous hug helped me get through the day. I broke down every day at work that week and went to see a therapist who made me feel even worse than before I walked into his office.

My friend from training changed everything for me when she recommended the life coaching seminar. It had changed her life and self-confidence and it would for me, too. The seminar helped me realize that my self-doubt stemmed from my childhood abandonment feelings, which are not unusual.

The realizations I had, coupled with my yoga training, finally gave me the strength and conviction to call my dad and ask him if he loved me. All of my life, I thought he didn’t and that he would die and we would have never made amends. My heart beat out of my chest as the phone rang and he picked it up.

“Dad,” I said.

“Yes, Brenda.” He said.

“Do you love me? Why did you break up the family?” I asked, shaking on the steps of a New York City building on a blistering summer afternoon.

“Brenda—I never wanted my family to break up. All I ever wanted was a family since my dad left my mom and I—and of course I love you.”

That moment changed everything. All of a sudden, the world shifted. It felt as if everything became lighter in feeling and color.

All of a sudden, I could be whoever I wanted to be.

I knew I would be a successful yoga teacher or anything else I wanted. I knew I deserved a man who loved and respected me because now the first and number one man in my life loved me. That meant a lot more than words can express.

The next call was to my mom.

“Mom—I want you to know that I love you and that I am quitting Hess to become a full-time yoga teacher.”

“Estas loca!!!” my mom shrieked.

“I understand you are saying this because you love me Mom, but I am still doing it. I love you.”

And I did. I walked away from my six-figure job at Hess and never looked back.

My entire life I knew I wanted to help people and I finally found the main way how—through yoga.

Letting go of the fear and committing to making my dreams come true has allowed me the three most fulfilling and magical years of my life. I now lead my own international retreats, teacher training, and private and group classes. My story and passion for helping others and community has also allowed me to partner with inspiring brands like Lululemon Athletica.

My advice is to slow down, breathe and ask yourself if you are living fully, happily and without regret. Your happiness is the biggest reward possible. When you are happy and healthy, you can truly be there for yourself and others. Isn’t that worth the risk?

My hairdresser was the first person to tell me about sulphate-free shampoo a few years ago. I took her word for it that it was bad for me and starting buying shampoo without it. What we didn’t know was that many shampoo manufacturers replaced sulphates in their products with another ingredient that exposed us to a carcinogen. Yes, I did, and you may have cancer-causing products that you are using on your skin and hair.

Knowledge is power so I would like to make you aware of 3 toxic ingredients to avoid in order to keep you and your family safe.

#1 Sulfates - Sodium Lauryl Sulfate (SLS), Sodlium Laureth Sulfate (SLES)

SLS is a very common ingredient in our everyday products. It is so powerful and harsh that it is also used for industrial cleaning. It is used in our products because it is cheap to produce and has a long shelf-life. Used to dissolve oil, it is commonly found in face cleaners, tooth paste and floor cleaners…

Its harshness removes the protective film on your skin, which is your natural moisturizer and barrier from virus and bacteria and first line of defense of your immune system.When consumers became aware of SLS, many manufacturers responded by creating SLES, a more gentle version to be used in beauty products. Unfortunately, the byproduct accidently created by the SLS process is a carcinogen (1.4 Dioxane). Because it is accidentally produced, the manufacturers don’t have to tell you about it, unless you live in CA where their laws require carcinogens to be listed on labels no matter what.

#2 Parabens - Methylparaben, Ethylparaben, Propylparaben and Butylparaben

These synthetic preservatives have been linked to endocrine disruption. They mimic estrogen, disrupting the body’s hormone system. Cornell University reports that a high lifelong exposure to estrogen can increase breast cancer risk.

#3: DEA/TEA - Diethanolamine and Triethanolamine

These ethanolomines are produced from a process called ethoxylation which yields the by-product 1,4 Dioxane These hormone disrupting chemicals are known to form cancer causing nitrates and nitrosamines. According to Dr. Samuel Epstein, Professor of Environmental Health at the University of Illinois, “repeated skin applications of DEA-based detergents resulted in a major increase in the incidence of two cancers – liver and kidney.

Although these toxic ingredients are in a lot of the brands we are used to, there are a number of organic brands for skin care and hair care that you can trust. My personal favorite is SheaMoisture, a NY-based company that prides itself on making products that are healing inside and out.

60% of what you put on your skin gets absorbed so be aware of what you put on it.

Namaste,
Brenda.

Yoga has helped and continues to help me with my body issues by helping me change how I view and feed my body.

Many students start practicing yoga in order to lose weight and they do. Part of their success is the exercise, but the true key is the mindfulness that yoga gives you. Use your newly calm and centered yoga mind to reflect on the following:

#1 Your Body Image
Most of us have a very distorted view of what we look like because of the constant media messages that program you to think you are not ok as you are. Calculate your BMI or Body Mass Index. It’s not a perfect tool, but will give you an idea of your current state of health. You don’t need to look like a supermodel. It’s not sustainable or healthy.

If you have a healthy BMI, but don’t feel energized, simply observe your diet and start adding more energizing vs. processed foods and observe the changes. Focus less on how you look and more on how you feel.

#2 The Root of Your Hunger
If your BMI is not currently in the healthy zone, choose today to be your starting point towards being more mindful of your eating habits. Next time you are about to reach for a bite to eat, ask yourself if you are really hungry or if there is something else going on. Are you nervous about something? Bored? Angry?

If you are eating for any other reason than the need for energy in your body, stop, take a few slow deep breaths and drink a glass of water.  You can also journal about how you feel in these moments. Giving yourself these time outs before eating will help you be more mindful about why and how much you eat.

#3 Your Food Choices
Most yogis practice ahimsa or non-violence so they do not eat animal products. This may or may not be right for your body. Healthier food choices should be explored. Dairy and wheat products have been linked to bloating and easy weight gain. Refined sugar causes spikes in your energy and mood swings. Meat is linked to many health risks.

Test taking out one of these food categories for a week and journal how it affects your body and your mind. Testing one at a time will help you isolate how each food is affecting you and therefore tailor a food plan that is right for you.

Use the mindfulness and self-control you practice in yoga to kick-start a healthier way of feeding and viewing your body.

Namaste,
Brenda

Don’t let long hours at the office cause you to suffer from tight shoulders and hips or an achy lower back.

Try these three simple poses to keep you feeling positive and healthy. You can easily do them at the office, at the airport or any place with a seat.

Yoga shoulder stretch

While sitting or standing, interlace your fingers in front of you and reach your arms overhead. Inhale as you shrug your shoulders towards your ears and exhale as you gently relax the shoulders down. Hold here for 3 breath cycles and release.

Seated yoga hip opener

In your desk chair, on the train or wherever you can find a comfortable seat on the go, cross your left leg over the right thigh. Holding onto the sides of the seat, inhale as you open your chest and exhale as you fold forward over the crossed legs. Take atleast 3 breath cycles here and then repeat on the other side. Modifications: If it’s not possible to cross your leg over the thigh, start by crossing at the ankles.

Seated yoga twist for lower back release and digestion

In your desk chair or seat on the go, place your left hand on the outside of your right thigh and your right hand behind you on the seat. Inhale as you lengthen your spine, exhale as you press into both hands and open your chest towards the side wall, gazing over your shoulder. Hold for atleast 3 breath cycles and then repeat on the other side.

With love and gratitude,
Brenda

Almonds are high in monounsaturated fats, which are the same type of healthy-promoting fats found in olive oil. Monounsaturated fats have been shown to reduce the risk of heart disease. In addition to having LDL-cholesterol lowering effects and being rich in vitamin E, almonds contain the important minerals magnesium and potassium, as well as trace minerals manganese and copper. Almonds appear to soften after-meal spikes in blood sugar and contain antioxidants which absorb and neutralize small amounts of free radicals in the body. Almonds have a high concentration of protein. A quarter-cup contains 7.62 grams – more protein than a typical egg, which contains 5.54 grams. You can soak almonds overnight and remove peels before eating a handful a day – or use them as a base for blends.

Avocados are rich sources of vitamins K, B6, C, E, folate (a B vitamin) and the minerals potassium and copper. They also have a super abundance of dietary fiber. Avocados contain oleic acid, a monounsaturated fat that may help to lower cholesterol and has recently been shown to offer significant protection against breast cancer, prostate cancer and oral cancer. Enjoying a few slices of avocado in your salad or mixing it in your favorite salsa will greatly increase your body’s ability to absorb the health-promoting carotenoids that vegetables provide. Avocados have 60% more potassium than bananas and they have the highest fiber content of any fruit (75% insoluble and 25% soluble fiber). An avocado can be a meal unto itself; it is a perfect food.

Oranges supply energizing carbohydrates and vitamin C, which plays an important role in cancer prevention, healthy blood circulation and wound-healing. Oranges are a good source of the crucial B vitamin folate, which is essential in preventing birth defects and fighting heart disease. Oranges are also an excellent source of potassium, which is needed to maintain proper fluid balances. Oranges contain an array of phytochemicals which help fight age-related diseases. Oranges, as well as some other fruits, contain a water-soluble fiber called pectin. Studies have shown that pectin helps reduce blood cholesterol levels. Oranges provide antioxidants, which help protect the skin from free-radical damage known to cause signs of aging and may protect against heart disease. Oranges make a great snack or breakfast.

Carrots are an excellent source of antioxidant compounds and the richest vegetable source of vitamin A. Carrots ’antioxidant compounds help protect against cardiovascular disease and cancer, and also promote good vision – especially night vision. Carrots may also be beneficial to blood sugar regulation. Carrots are one of the richest sources of carotenoids. Just one cup provides 16,679 IU’s of beta-carotene, and high carotenoid intake has been linked to a 20% decrease in postmenopausal breast cancer and an up to the 50% decrease in the incidence of cancers of the bladder, cervix, prostate, colon, larynx and esophagus. Extensive human studies suggest that a diet including as little as one carrot per day could cut the rate of lung cancer in half. Carrots are an excellent ingredient in a large glass of fresh mixed vegetable juice.

Celery. The entire celery plant is gently stimulating, nourishing and restorative. Celery juice can be taken for joint and urinary tract inflammations such as rheumatoid arthritis, cystitis or urethritis, as well as for weak conditions and nervous exhaustion. Celery is rich in vitamins K, C and folate and the mineral potassium. Celery boast many health benefits, including lowering cholesterol and possibly blood pressure, helping to rid the body of excess fluid, and preventing free radicals from damaging cells. Celery contains active compounds called phthalides, which can help relax the muscles around the arteries and allow those vessels to dilate. With more space inside the arteries, blood can flow at a lower pressure. Pthalides also reduce stress hormones, which can cause blood vessels to constrict. Celery is a top-rated vegetable for any purification cleanse, and can always be part of any green juice.

Spinach has a well-deserved reputation as a superfood and is rich in many essential nutrients. Spinach has an abundance of vitamins K and A, manganese, folate, magnesium, calcium and iron. The flavonoids and carotenoids contained in spinach can help combat various forms of cancer, and Vitamin K1, along with calcium and magnesium, helps to promote bone strength. The iron in spinach is important for the body’s production of hemoglobin and myoglobin and the oxygenation of red blood cells. When spinach is cooked, the oxalic acid forms into crystals and the spinach’s beneficial properties are lost. Spinach should always be consumed raw, in salad or juice.

Tomatoes are rich in vitamin C and the phyonutrient Lycopene. Tomatoes have been shown by many studies to be helpful in promoting the health of the colon, prostate and pancreas. The health benefits of tomatoes are increase when combined with either broccoli or avocado. Lycopen has an antioxidant function as well as the ability to assist the body in preventing in the growth of certain cancers. Combining tomatoes with foods containing health fats such as avocado, olive oil or nuts helps to increase their health benefits.

Watermelon is a high-vibration fruit known to be the healthiest of all fruits due to its exceptionally high water content (90%). Like the tomato, watermelon is a rich source of lycopene, and recent studies show it can be a tonic for male sexual dysfunction. One may fast on only watermelon as a means to achieve a “house-cleaning” and rejuvenate the entire body.

Lemons are commonly used in the Yogic diet and are widely grown all over the world. Although the lemon is often thought of as acidic, it is very effective in curing many digestive problems when mixed with warm water. Fresh-squeezed lemon juice mixed with warm water and just a little raw honey, agave nectar or maple syrup, then taken regularly in the morning, acts as a tonic to the liver and stimulates it to produce bile to aid in digesting the day’s food. Because of its high Vitamin C content, it is believed that lemons prevent and treat many infections. It is also believed that lemons speed the healing of wounds and reduce fever. Lemons are also a diuretic. Lemons are a safe, inexpensive and natural substance that can be used by those suffering from urinary tract infections or other high uric acid problems such as arthritis or rheumatism. Lemons bring relief by helping to flush out toxins and harmful bacteria.

Pineapples are tropical fruits that are actually not just one fruit, but a composite of many flowers whose individual “fruitlets” fuse together around a central core. Pineapple boasts wonderful nutritional properties. It is an excellent source of vitamins B1, B6 and C and the minerals manganese and copper. Pineapples are also a good source of dietary fiber and the enzyme protease. Manganese is essential for the body’s energy production processes and antioxidant defenses.

Enjoy!

Namaste,
Brenda

You can practice your walking meditation around your home, in a park or during your walk to work. It’s simple, relaxing and grounding for your mind and body.

Step 1: Put away all electronic devices and let your arms be relaxed at your sides or held behind you. Relax your shoulders and softly gaze forward.

Step 2: Step slowly, feeling your connection to the earth as you move from foot to foot. As Thich Nhat Hanh says, be aware of how you “touch the ground.” Shift your walking to a softer and more grounded pace.

Step 3: Notice your breathing and try breathing even more deeply and slowly. You will notice how your slower breathing also slows down your pace.

Step 4: During your walk, take a moment to appreciate your surroundings. Notice the color of the sky, the sounds of the birds, the tree leaves blowing in the wind.

Walking meditation easily connects you with nature  and allows its calm to relax your body and mind.

When we take the time to appreciate nature’s beauty and our connection to it, we become more aware of our part in protecting it.

Happy Earth Day fellow yogis

Namaste,
Brenda

Here are my favorite natural ways to keep your head and nose clear during allergy season:

1. KAPALABHATI BREATHING – This breathing exercise is like spring cleaning for your nasal passages. I recommend adding this practice to your morning routine during allergy season.

Step 1: Sitting comfortably on a mat or on a chair, lengthen your spine.

Step 2: As if you were blowing your nose into a tissue, forcefully exhale through your nose and inhale naturally through your nose.

Step 3: At your own pace, repeat this forceful exhalation and natural inhalation for a minimum of 50 to a max of 200 breath cycles.

2. BRIDGE POSE – This is a simple yoga back bending pose that will help you expand the chest and lungs, increasing breathing capacity and thereby reducing your symptoms.

Bridge Pose

Step 1: Lie on your back on a mat, bend your knees and step your heels as close to your buttocks as possible.

Step 2: Keeping your feet hips distance apart, draw your hips up. Your hands can be on the outside of your hips or interlaced beneath you.

Step 3: Squeeze your thighs toward each other. Hold here for 5-10 breath cycles.

You can practice 1 to 3 sets like this.

3. LAVENDER – Did you know that lavender is a natural antihistamine? Add lavender oil to your bath, diffuse it in your home or use a lavender infused moisturizer. I love Shea Moisture’s yummy Lavender & Wild Orchid Body Butter.

Lavender is also calming so it will help add a sense of peace to the beginning or end of your day.

In the past few months, “letting go” has been my greatest lesson as I was confronted with reports of cancer in a family member and two students.

Staring into the eyes of a dear student sharing her deepest fear of dying and not being there to see her son grow up made me realize how helpless I really am. I just listened, holding her hand and giving her all of my attention. I encouraged her to cry and release everything as that is part of the healing process. I didn’t have to say much as her yoga studies empowered her with knowledge and faith.

During my conversation with this student and the others, my mind spoke up “how can I help them?” “how can I save them?” and I quickly silenced that voice as I am just a person like them, not a doctor or God.

What is under my control and yours, is being present to those with pain or suffering around you. Hold their hands as they share with you. Listen to them with all your attention. Hug them with the engagement of your whole heart.  Send them positive energy and dedicate your meditation and yoga practice to them. Surrender to not knowing what will happen, but have faith.

We can all die at any moment, without warning. We can’t control that or much else. We can control how present we are right now and how we think, speak and act.

Let’s not wait to be confronted by death, to realize how blessed we are right now.

Namaste,
Brenda

Our ecolodge was situated in the lush jungle of the Osa Peninsula with a soundtrack of howler monkeys, exotic birds, cicadas and more… We were delighted by these sounds as well as the awe-inspiring sights everywhere we looked: breathtaking beaches, families of monkeys swinging by, colorful toucans, and friendly waving plants. No television. No computers. No distractions. It was the perfect environment for everyone to find some peace.

And they did. The retreaters, ranging from their 20s to 60s, male and female, took on a strenuous nature hike, walked up waterfalls, climbed and propelled off trees, swam with dolphins and more…
We took midnight walks in the pitch black jungle to find the most magical spot for stargazing. We shared life experiences during yoga philosophy and chakra talks and connected during thai massage and partner yoga workshops.

In the end, we discovered bliss in nature, in ourselves and in each other. We truly became a new kula, or yoga family.

My hope is that it is the first of many magical journeys to help yogis experience true bliss and community.

THE GOOD

Many people feel that hot yoga is only a physical practice, but I disagree. It requires extra body awareness to keep your body safe and mental strength and breath awareness to keep calm and centered in the extreme heat. It also feels really good during winter months.

I myself started practicing with Bikram Yoga, the hottest of hot yoga. It was physically challenging for sure, but even more than that was how it challenged my mind. You are choosing to put yourself in a steaming room and workout in it. Your mind is screaming to get out and be comfortable in a normal temperature, but strength of mind as well as body and breath awareness keeps you in the room and trying your best. I strongly believe that my early hot yoga practice helped me transform my breathing capabilities for the more advanced regular yoga practices I delved into later in my yoga journey.

THE BAD

People practicing any type of hot yoga, especially beginners, should take extra precaution in class. Because the heat makes you feel like you can stretch deeper into poses, it gives you a false sense of flexibility. If you are many inches from touching your toes in normal temperature, don’t strain yourself to grab them in class. Overstretching in a heated room can commonly lead to muscle strains or damage to your joints.

The heat also puts more strain on your heart and challenges your endurance.

Hot yoga is not recommended during pregnancy or if you have extremely high blood pressure. If you have any conditions that make you concerned about trying hot yoga, ask your physician for their advice. If you decide to take class, let the teacher know of your condition well before practice so they can give you modifications and keep an eye on you.

STAYING SAFE

A few tips for staying safe in a hot yoga class include:

- Drinking lots of water beforehand and bringing water with you
- Bringing a towel mat and hand towel
- Wearing light and breathable clothing
- Breathing through your nose to keep your mind calm.
- Listening to your body to avoid overstretching
- Pacing yourself. Start slowly and take breaks when you need them.

Both hot and regular yoga provide great physical and mental benefits. If you find that hot yoga is not right for you, find another yoga style that does work well for you. There are lots to choose from.